GOOD TIMES

Pippa and I knock another VAT return on the head - this time in record time - and then go have a niec treat over at Maison B to celebrate. This is our new bestie fave.

Then we got back to the office and worked out how to use iMovie and Madame has made her first YouTube video that I hope she blogs here soon!

Later on we had a quiet rosé [hohoho yes I know Pippa...] at The Coach and Horses with Max. Then who should roll up but the old 7 Year Glitch crew with DJ ASSAULT!!

Brains and DJ Assault


Lektrogirl, DJ Assault and Philippa Cardinal


DJ Assault wid all dem hoes. Scratch that, I mean Madame.

I tried all night to explain to all and sundry who DJ Assault is. I can't believe people don't know. If you ever heard any ghetto tech or booty bass or in DJ Assault's own words "accelerated funk" then it was probably him. Or DJ Godfather. But DJ Assault has got beef with him cause DJ Godfather is only in the game for the money [apparently]. As I can't sing it all to you, I can only say go here and buy a few MP3's for .99c My personal favourites are Sex On The Beach and Hoes Get Naked.

We tried to explain to DJ Assault what Showerface meant but I'm not sure he really got it. He was more interested in the fruit juice cocktails Pippa was having made for him at the bar. I heard he only drank milk but apparently these days he has switched to fruit juice cause he has to watch his physique.

On another note - YOU HAVE TO GET INTO MAISON B ASAP! The new SONIA is there too along with all the APC. I'm about to go shopping. There isn't gonna be a lot left once I've rinsed the place!!

xx Emma

ANOTHER PARTY

Oh and I forgot this party too [as modelled by the gorgeous Philippa Cardinal]...

SATURDAY 21 JULY
7 YEAR GLITCH v DO IT!
Room 1 DJ ASSAULT / STARKEY / RUFF SQWAD / SKULL JUICE / 7 YEAR GLITCH / PRANCEHALL / LOUIS ENCHANTE
Room 2 FAGGATRONIX / MATTHEW !WOWOW! / JO APPS / G.U.N.I.T / REKLESS / EASYCHORD
at CORSICA STUDIOS (elephant and castle)
11 PM - 5 AM
£7 / £5 concessions

Even though I'm sure Madame can still "do it" without toppling off her stillies, I don't think she will be coming along to this. But Paul is DJing [7 Year Glitch] and I will definitely be working out what to wear for the whole week before.

And here is a funny photo diary Bitch Ass Darius made once when he booked DJ Assault to play for him.

And if you still don't know who DJ Assault is, he made these following tracks: Ass and Titties, Asses Jiggalin' and Titties Wigglin', Hoes Get Naked, Dick By The Pound etc etc. I think you get the picture!

xx Emma

COINCIDENTALLY PARIS!

I haven't shown my face on the Maison B blog for a loooon time. So here is a report from me [but let's rewind backwards] with all the news I got to bring.

Last weekend, I was in Paris and as a happy co-incidence, so were Max and Pippa buying for the A.P.C. collection! So it was omlettes and Rosé all round. Pippa and I were DV camera's all up in each others faces cause we are in the middle of making another video for Madame. But here is the real co-incidence: of all the shops in Paris and all the things we could buy - Pippa and I both had gone past the same shop at different times and ogled the same jewellery. Only I was the only one who bought it. Pippa was too gutted for words. I let her have a little turn of them in the A.P.C. showroom. But not too long.

We were also on a mission to find Fifi Chachnil. It isn't on Rue de Chambon any more. And the number isn't the one listed in the Time Out guide. On a MISSION I actually stopped a family with a young grumpy looking baby and a father with bored death eyes to get the mother to listen to the new number on the phone for the new shop and write it down for us... It was worth it! 40% off in Fifi Chachnil!!



Okay and so the week before that, my friends Jacob [from Paperrad] and David were in town with their band Extreme Animals. They are touring round Europe. The first gig was at the Old Blue Last where DJ Brain and Silverlink asked Cassette Playa and I to have a booty dance off challenge. I won. Don't cry Cassette Playa. You can share my glory.


Hmmm... The week before that, it was my friend Thugly's birthday. Thugly is one of the 7 Year Glitch crew. He had cocktails at the Hilton. Here is a pic of internet thug and epicenter of the UK grime scene, Prancehall, ordering off menu and getting one of the most fabulous strawberry daquaris I've seen.


But at risk of being thrown in the Big Brother diary room - maybe that drink is a bit gay? Look at his pinky finger.

The coolest thing that has happened though is Paul B. Davis had his exhibition at Seventeen gallery on Kingsland Road for the last month. It was a lot of new media, computer and video art. Here is a picture of the video Paul made in collaboration with Jacob Ciocci which is in essence two YouTube videos mixed together not using a video editing software, but actually editing the source at code [like all the 000's and 111's and 101's etc] to 'beatmatch' musically and visually Rhiannas "Umbrella" and The Cranberries "Zombie".

It was really cool - the audio mixed perfectly while the visuals were faces of the two different artist morphing into the other in a sea of pixels and distortion.

Okay - so enough from me, I got to get editing video from Paris! Nice talking to you all again!

xx Emma

IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME

Ahhh! Back in the driving seat at the office upstairs in the universe of The World According To... and Shop At Maison Bertaux. I feel like I was away for a zillion years, but really I just spent the last weekend DJing in Hamburg. I had been a long time since I was with my Hamburg Homies, but it felt like only yesterday since I saw them all there. The reason for me hopping over there was to DJ at the best club in Europe [actually de:bug magazine listed it as second in like the first time in 5 years this year...] and you may think "Oh wow! What the hell can the best club in Europe look like?" Well folks... Here it is:

The Golden Pudel.
This place is like a little charm on the bank of the Elbe river that from the outside looks like some crappy shack. Well actually it is kind of a crappy shack. But that is just how everyone likes it.


Here are two of my best friends, Superdefekt and Booty Carrell. Booty Carrell is one of the coolest dressers on hear but for proof check my whole flickr set from Hamburg. Total white trash pimp style.
I played on Friday night with Prokoller and Booty Carrell and then on Sunday with Superdefekt and my good buddies from Dresden, Mash Gordon also did a live gig.

Unfortunately I missed most of their set cause I ended up helping out behind the bar which had been a fantasy job of mine for some time.

Anyway the other thing other than The Golden Pudel to check out in Hamburg is THE BUNKER:

It is right on Feldstrasse - you can't miss it when you come out of the U-Bahn at the Feldstrasse stop. It still stand because apparently the only way to destroy it would be to use a huge amount of explosives cause the walls are so thick. Unfortunately, this would also take out half the surrounding suburbs.

The other thing you gotta have when you are in German is a freshly baked pretzel!

On Sunday morning we went over to a Bavarian friends house for a Bavarian traditional brekkie - white sausages cooked in hot water and loads of beer. We even ate the sausage in the traditional way where you have to score the skin of the sausage, then peel it off before you can eat it. But it has to be the weirdest faux sexual experience of my life - you are left with something uncannily like a condom in one hand and in the other you have a warm semi solid phallic object that you then have to put in your mouth and eat in front of a lot of half drunk Germans who think it is cute and funny to make the girl from London do this at 10am in the morning. Blurgh!


The other thing you might want to check out in Hamburg is the Reeperbahn. Just for all the weird things you might see for sale in the shop along the way:



In other news, the other week I went to 7 Year Glitch vs Dirty canvas - but only cause Paul was Djing. Ruff Squad MC'd and then Tempa T turned up for a go.


Tempa T has the coolest fade but a shame he only has one jumper. For more pics from the night check here.

Finally - I bought: THE NEW A.P.C. GREY DRESS, THE A.P.C. YELLOW LEATHER WALLET, THE A.P.C. STRIPEY LOGO T, THE A.P.C. KNITTED RAFFIA BAG BUT THE A.P.C. SIZE 40 DOLLY SHOES IN BLACK DIDN'T FIT SO SOME OTHER LUCKY GIRL IS GOING TO GET THEM. ARGGGGGHH!! Gutted.

xx Emma

BIRTHDAY AND MORE!!

Too much to say about the rest of my birthday weekend - a small party at a bar in the West End then off to a rave in Hackney Wick... Here are a few pics:









Then after a whole days bed rest and a day back in the office, I have had time to put together the two videos I promised of Max fresh from his trip in Hong Kong and another of Pippa trying on the new Eley Kishimoto archive collection for the store!!



And as soon as youTube gets it act together and processes Max I will post him up too.

xx Emma